Notebook for
The Desi Guide to Dating
What’s a Date?
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Today, folks are increasingly meeting via dating apps and the first meeting does qualify as a date but romance isn’t a necessity.
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gives us an idea of what is out there in the world, and this will only help develop longer lasting, and happier relationships in the long run.
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If you have dated, you’ll never wonder if you could’ve found a better partner.
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And here you thought that a peck on the lips at the end of dinner meant the date went off swimmingly.
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Love comes much AFTER the first date, maybe even many years after. Please don’t proclaim your love to someone on the first date, especially if you do not know them. We understand that you may have feelings, or chemistry towards your date, but that is certainly not love.
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Please don’t think that a co- ed dinner qualifies as a date. A date is when two people have some sort of romantic interest or chemistry between them. If you and a girl from college go out on dinner after a study night at the library, and you happen to pay the bill, it is not a date, especially if neither of you have specifically asked each other out.
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Dating does not have to be exclusive; you could be dating MANY people at the same time.
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It just means that you are exploring what’s out there, and getting to know the opposite sex from a romantic point of view.
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That is good way to put it
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At TrulyMadly, we get tons of feedback on how dating apps are so liberating for girls and they get to meet different guys beyond their neighbourhoods, campuses and offices.
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Tht is tru
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While being friendzoned is not a problem, what can be a problem is if it’s not clear to both people that ONLY friendship and nothing more is on offer.
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While it’s not unusual for girls to bring a friend along on the first date, if she does it the second time, perhaps she is looking for nothing more than friendship.
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A hook- up is a date too, just a different degree. But yeah ain’t cool if that’s not what you had in mind.
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It’s not a date if she looks at you, or smiles at you. This can just be a girl being polite and friendly.
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You were being a friend and her liking you back is not the prize you get for this decent human behaviour. You like her? Tell her. She doesn’t like you back? That’s o- k- a- y.
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friend- zoning from the male POV, keeping in mind that while friend- zoning DOES happen to girls, it is much more common with boys.
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People look at ‘friend- zoning’ as a negative thing. But why is being friends with someone so terrible? Friendship can be a wonderful thing.
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A girl is not obligated to like a boy who likes her, she is not obligated to return his romantic interest. No matter how much you like her, she does not ‘owe’ you anything.
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It is important to make your intentions clear from the get go else confusion will ensue.
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I don’t suggest you rush into marriage with him or anyone else for that matter without going out with him and understanding what he is all about.
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This was a hook- up, aka a one- night stand.
The Proposal
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We want to stay within our comfort zone. We don’t want to take risks. We fear rejection from the opposite sex.
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The thought of physically putting in the effort to meet someone (or many) and to actually talk to them, when it probably won’t work out anyway, can be an intimidating task. But taking the leap towards open- mindedness is the first step to a successful dating life.
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You must have a positive and open outlook towards your love life.
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The more people you meet, the higher the chances of meeting a partner of your dreams. So, be open and take a chance. You won’t regret
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The key to the perfect proposal is to do it in the most natural way.
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It’s important to make your intentions crystal clear while remaining respectful and decent.
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This is not the age of subtleties, which are anyway lost on men. In all probability, this is going to happen over a messenger chat.
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While being direct would be ideal, dating is a game, and to be successful at it, you must play it. The above is better than saying, ‘I really like you, let’s go on a date at a coffee place close by.’ DO NOT do that. Use some of your feminine charms, be subtle.
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Most girls enjoy some degree of flirting pre- proposal. When it’s time to ask her out, go the old- school and chivalrous way.
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WhatsApp is your new wingman. It’s intimate yet casual. Use it to the hilt. And yes, flirt a bit before. It’s more fun and sets the tone.
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Boys, let me tell you from experience, a little bit of earnestness pays off and is appreciated, but there is a fine line between being earnest and being desperate.
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While we prefer you asking her out in person, if you really can’t muster up the guts, you can do it over WhatsApp or any other such app.
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Both took place between two people who had an initial interest in each other.
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The trouble with chats is that a lot is lost in translation. You lose out on the nuances of facial expressions, voice, tone, energy, body movement and SO much more.
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Because he had nothing to lose, the boy went ahead and made a silly move by saying
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Prior to your first date, don’t over- text, just do enough to titillate and build interest. A little can go a long way: a flirtatious winky face, a casual ‘see you soon…’. Over- texting before the date is not good, no matter how well you two are virtually getting along.
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know we are all compelled to write one line SEND, one line SEND, one line SEND, but instead of doing this, write one line, or two if you must, and then wait for them to reply.
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Don’t reply immediately every time. We don’t want your prospective date thinking you’re just sitting there waiting for their text, even if this is the truth. Play a little hard to get, especially in the beginning. Let them think you have other things going on, even if you don’t.
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Use your instincts to decide when to reply immediately, and when to let things cool off. Practice makes perfect, hence chat with as many prospective dates as possible. And the only way is to use a dating app to get access and practice.
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Don’t write texts like gibberish, it makes the other person take you less seriously. Be coherent.
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Wren & Martin is out of circulation now.
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Let me just say that start off with whole words, if they reciprocate play along. If they answer in with ‘u’ der, swallow your pride and just say 4 u with a grinning, show- of- teeth emoji.
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DPs that get the most likes on TrulyMadly are ones that tell a little story and a bit about you.
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Sexting is avoidable till a later stage of a relationship. Of course there are always exceptions.
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If she doesn’t want to go on a date with you , you can try again, but not again and again and again and again.
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And ladies, we don’t want a man who relaxes. He should be working to keep you, especially in the beginning.
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The harder to get you are at the start, the more he will appreciate you later on.
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Don’t say no so many times that he doesn’t ask you out again.
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The dating game is all about power, and the more power you can keep in the relationship, the better. Remember the dating game IS a game. While in a long- term relationship, games can get pretty stale and boring, when you’re dating, you must be prepared to play.
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Sometimes men need that extra boost, but it is preferable if you can pass him the right hints and get him to ask you out.
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Sometimes your eyes can say more than words. Make sure he catches you looking at him once in a while and then turn your eyes away. Romance him with your eyes at this stage of the game.
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All of us feel more comfortable with our girls around,
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Firstly, DO NOT go and tell someone that you ‘love’ or ‘like’ them and that you want to go out on a date. It’s more elegant not to mention the word ‘date’ at all. Rather than saying, ‘I would like to go out on a date with you,’ it is better to say, ‘I would love to take you out for a cup of coffee sometime.’
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Be brazen
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You have got nothing to loosse and you only get the experience oftalking nd getting rejected
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It is not cool to ask her more than three times.
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Maybe there is something much better for you out there. Being positive means that you’re already winning at dating.
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There are other fish in the sea, let this one be.
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Maybe even something as simple as a ‘hey good looking,’ or ‘how is my main man doing today?’
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Sometimes such a direct proposal can be a bit intimidating, even if she does like you. The best is to be subtle, yet friendly, about your intentions.
The First Date
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Now it’s time to plan that first dream date. Remember, nothing prepares you better than preparation and as with anything else in life, a well- planned date will have higher chances of success.
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A wise person once said, ‘First impressions are the last.’ We truly believe in this and take dressing for the first date very seriously.
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If you want your man to make the effort to dress for you, you should make the effort for him.
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Also ladies, I believe in comfort first and foremost. Do not feel pressured by anyone to wear uncomfortable underwear.
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Eyes speak volumes, and sometimes giving the man the right kind of look can send a message that a thousand words cannot.
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I’d say just enough make up to look as close as possible to your DP please for the first few dates.
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89 per cent of men and 83 per cent of girls we interviewed found tattoos attractive and a turn on!
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So tattoo it is then
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Bad body odour is a huge turn off. It is a demonstrated psychological fact that unpleasant odours leave the most long- lasting sensory impression.
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Remember that the standards you apply to your date also apply to you.
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personally believe that a man should dress in order to make her friends jealous. Remember, that in dating, as in business, image goes a long way.
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In terms of cologne, think simple and elegant– Polo by Ralph Lauren is always a winner as is Cool Waters by Davidoff. Make sure your nails are trimmed and clean. Who knows, you may even get a chance to hold her hand, so make sure that you are prepared.
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Stubble and beards are all the vogue these days, but before you decide to go for this look, make sure that it is for you.
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As for beards– grow one if you like, but remember that beard care is an art on its own. An ungroomed, unkempt beard looks horrid, so try not to go down this route at all unless you have the time, energy, inclination and resources to take care of the beard.
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the venue can be any, as long as it’s possible for you two to have a conversation. If the place is too loud or too crowded,
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If you two get along, you can extend the date by going for a walk, getting a bite or watching a movie.
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First dates are tricky. Go to a public place. As a guy, suggest a place where you know anyone will feel comfortable meeting. Don’t suggest a cosy, quiet, romantic place for a first date. It will make any girl feel uncomfortable and question your intentions.
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You may be nervous, but this is totally natural.
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Remember though that this is meant to be fun, it’s not an exam, or a job interview, so take it easy, take a deep breath and tell yourself that you are going to try to have the best time that you possibly can. Have a positive intention, but don’t have too many expectations.
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Positive but no expectations
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If they are talking a lot in their nervous state of mind, try to understand this and be a good listener. If they freeze, then try to fill in the gaps. The person sitting in front of you may be even more nervous than you, and the key to a good first date is to be kind, sensitive and to be adaptable to any situation.
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Try not to be tongue- tied, don’t stare at his chest or her breasts, or their behind and don’t spend the entire date looking at your phone. In fact, try not to look at your phone during this time.
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In which case you are staring at the behind on another table, which is certainly not done! And, yes, no staring at anyone’s body parts, phone screen or into space.
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If you like him, play with your hair a bit (the universal symbol of flirtation) and talk to him with your eyes.
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There is nothing more attractive about you than your smile. Always remember that.
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When you flirt with someone, you create vibes that change the energy field between two people.
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stop stressing about the future, and just BE in the present.
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Just be. You are fabulous.
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You will be amazed and at much body movements matter in the art of flirting.
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Even the early dates should be kept short. Let him yearn to see you.
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Men, show your interest in her with your ears and mind, not just your body. Be attentive. Use body language to listen actively, by leaning forward to show you are captivated by her stories, or laughing appreciatively at the punchlines of her jokes. Don’t immediately touch her arms or her hair. Keep your distance. Touchy- feely guys can be a big turn off for a girl if they are not ready for that yet.
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Your first date may be your last with one person, but it is NOT your last date for life. If it doesn’t go well, don’t be dejected. Remember the golden rule of dating is to try, try and try again!
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Be positive and success will come your way.
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After all, you don’t want to give him a false impression of who you are. You should just try to bring out your natural best in whatever way possible.
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It is natural to be nervous, especially if you haven’t met before.
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Knowing Indian parents, most will not support the dating life, so you have to come with other ways.
After the First Date
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Say that you really enjoyed spending time with her and you hope to see her again really soon. Guys, you may think this is sappy, but this is exactly the kind of stuff girls love and appreciate.
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I say leave the sex and the sexual tension for later, rock star.
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Be mature, move on and this is the reason god gave us dating apps.
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If you don’t intend to see him again, don’t lead him on by sending him smiley and kissy faces. Definitely no winky face. Some of these emoticons can be very suggestive, especially blushy face.
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Remember– a no is no. If she is not interested in you, no matter what you say or do, she may not change her mind. Do not resort to online or real- life stalking. It is detrimental and harmful to everyone involved
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Ladies, you are the one who sets the pace in the relationship, typically guys want to take things really fast.
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Guys don’t appreciate girls chasing them, it can be a big turn off for them. The male ego always likes a bit of a chase, so you have to play it cool.
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Try to gauge what he wants, and see if that is in line with what YOU want. Does he want a relationship or does he just want to get into your pants?
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Oh, please, no politics! Not so early in the relationship. If he flirts and you like him, flirt back mildly.
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Sometimes, especially in the beginning, if you two are texting back and forth a lot, things can be misinterpreted and feelings can be hurt.
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It’s important to mind your words in the early stages of dating.
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Even if you have had many partners, do not mention them or bring them up. Do not compare the present with the ex, not even by mistake.
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Sometimes, we want the other person to know that we HAVE had a past, and that we aren’t newbies on the field. If you feel that this is necessary, do so, but be vague and most certainly do not take any names.
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Your past is nobody’s business, except your own and even if you are totally comfortable with your past,
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Don’t give him too much information about your exes or your history with intimacy. Men are driven by pride, they are often thinking, ‘What can I do for her that is different than any other man?’
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The past has a way of corrupting a man’s imagination because of the male ego and pride.
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Our social media accounts are how we present ourselves to the world, and just like we maintain bodily hygiene,
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How can you like a girl so much in one meeting. She’s not a pair of Levi’s hanging on a rack. Hang out a bit, get the feels and then figure out if both of you are right for each other.
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instantaneous responses in this day and age of social media, but breathe, have some patience and wait.
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Be in touch, chat with her– that’s all good– but limit yourself on the phone and messaging, and try to spend more in- person time if possible, especially at the start.
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People love chatting. Chatting is no indication of love, friendship yes, and that’s a great way to start a relationship. Ira is right, meet in- person and figure out where this is going.
The Third Date Onwards
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Remember boys and girls, the two sexiest muscles in your body are your brain and your ears.
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If after three dates you like them, don’t drag your feet. Make that person the focus of your personal life and do what you can to move swiftly into the relationship zone.
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Remember that ambiguity and anticipation are sexy in the bedroom, it is nice when you’re playing the dating game, but when it comes to relationship- building, openness and honesty are key.
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It’s nice to bring the person you like into your personal space, it helps them understand a bit more about who you are.
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Having heart- to- heart conversations while taking a stroll amidst nature is one of the most blissful experiences.
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Girls, a long walk gives you the ability to showcase your fitness levels. Boys love girls who can keep up.
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Go window shopping or even better, take a food tour.
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You may not have a car, or a two- wheeler, but you can go on a long drive on a comfortable bus, or even just cruise around in an Ola/ Uber. Autorikshaws too can be fun sometimes.
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Go back and forth on her suggestions, value add to them, but always let her feel totally comfortable with the idea.
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At times, girls refuse to let guys pay for them, it hurts their sense of worth.
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There is no gain in paying for things that you cannot comfortably afford, no matter how much you love her.
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Ladies, I urge you to pick up a bill or two, even if they are small ones, like coffee or taxis (if this is all you can afford). It sends the right kind of signal to men, and tells them that not only are you capable of paying the bill,
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If he is the type of guy who feels he has some sort of ‘right’ over you just because he is footing the bill, then you paying once in a while, will keep his ego in check.
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That makes sense
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Will he think you’re ‘loose’ if you kiss him, or will she think you are too aggressive if you make a move?
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It is important to keep your head tightly screwed on in the beginning so that you can accurately assess if he/ she is a keeper.
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If there is reciprocity, take things ahead. But know when to stop– that is super critical. Respect the other person and you will take the right decision.
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endorse ‘mindful intimacy’, where you take well thought- out decisions about the physical steps that you want to take with someone instead of letting your hormones dictate the terms.
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Enjoy getting to know them without the pressure of getting physical and try to build a genuine friendship before you decide on jumping into the haystack.
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Keep in mind that most women need a reason to be physical while most men just need a place. That crucial difference is imperative to keep in mind here. Take your time, ladies. If he likes you, he will wait. Always.
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Intimacy and sex is a physical need, just like hunger. When you are hungry you don’t think much… you choose between a fruit and chips at best.
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I would suggest you stop texting her completely and start focusing on your own hobbies and interests. It is always important to not lose sight of yourself in any relationship, no matter how intensely you feel. Remember, at the end of the day, you are your own best companion.
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Tht is a good advice
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In our country, acceptance of love can be a very complicated and potentially dangerous issue. Too many people harbour a backward and regressive attitude to modern relationships.
Acts of Intimacy
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Hand holding can be very scary, very intimate and also very sexy and romantic.
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If you take public transport, then it is advisable to buy some hand sanitiser (preferably lightly scented) so you can quickly clean your hands without the hassle of finding a restroom.
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If holding hands becomes too cumbersome, just gently put your hand on the small of her back and guide her wherever it is you want to take her.
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It’s kind of sexy to let her have control of holding your hand. Let her decide when to hold on or to let go.
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There is nothing more delicately erotic than linking arms with a man.
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Guys, women often take great pains with their hair, so you don’t want to ruin her look and send her back to the salon the next day.
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Start by sweeping any stray hairs off her eyes, and tuck them gently behind her ear while maintaining eye contact.
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This is a great way to get his/ her juices flowing.
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What
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but when done properly, massage is a therapeutic and effective way to connect with someone close to you.
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There is enough research out there that women love intimacy and sex as much as the guy next door.
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We need to be turned on too (yes, biologically we get turned on much faster!) and the moment has to be right.
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There is a common misconception that guys are only after one thing: a physical connection. While this is true for a few individuals, it is incorrect for most men. Men and women alike want connection, laughter and love.
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Physical intimacy is not inherently dirty or bad. With a loving partner in a trusting and committed relationship, it can be a healthy and joyful expression of love.
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It is very common for women to give in because of emotional pressure or fear of offending. Consent is key.
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Don’t make out in public. PDA, especially in India, is not advisable, especially with all the untoward forces at play. Safety should be our number one concern, and we would not want you getting into trouble.
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Just remember that we live in a society which is a mix of traditional and modern. While you may well try to be a modern- minded person, you have to be sensitive of the ‘cultural’ (in the minds of some) forces at play in India.
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Offer him your hand, or gently take his in yours. Maybe he’s just shy and respectful, or inexperienced. Most women don’t realise that men feel a lot of pressure to be ‘macho’, and this can make even stud muffin crumble.
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Sometimes, boys can just be really nervous.
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The key to a good relationship is communication.
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Keep at it and, like many believers before you, you too will be proudly announced as someone’s boyfriend soon.
The First Kiss
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By the fourth, fifth or sixth date if a gentle kiss doesn’t happen then one party may be confused and unsure. You don’t want to wait too long else he may lose interest or confidence.
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Men are usually more eager to kiss or get physical for that matter and that’s just how we are wired. But I guess we enjoy (or dislike) the same things about a kiss that girls do.
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If both of you enjoy that first experience, believe me, there will be many more and a lot more spontaneous.
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strongly urge all boys and girls in anticipation of their first kiss to carry chewing gum, mints and any other convenient forms of mouth fresheners with you.
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Flossing can go a long way to mitigate halitosis, and can actually also prevent heart disease.
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I’d say up your game from Vaseline or some lip balm. Or something peppermint- y to let the kiss tingle.
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Last but not the least is body odour– use a deodorant, and use a nice one.
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Sometimes this works against them. It may lead girls to believe that they’re just trying to get into her pants, and can cause her to be suspicious or even put
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Ladies remember, prudence– yes, pride– no.
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If you kiss him first, he will admire your confidence. He will also understand who controls the pace of the relationship.
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I think kisses are enjoyed with eyes closed, but most people take a peek and if you peek at the same time, you are so made for each other. Kiss on!
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Do not put too much pressure on yourself and certainly not your partner, do not let the thought of the first kiss stress you out, instead look forward to it, enjoy the act itself and be positive and hopeful about all the sweet kisses that are waiting for you the near future.
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just talking about what both of you felt. Yeah, a good kiss does cement the relationship.
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When you start talking about sex, you have to start thinking about lots of other things like unplanned pregnancy, methods of contraception and ways to keep safe from sexually transmitted diseases.
The Dos and Don’ts of Online Dating with TrulyMadly
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making it easier than ever before to meet people, it can also be confusing, ego- smashing and sometimes, even heart- breaking.
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You may not believe it, but he/ she knows you much better than you know yourself. Before you post your profile, get a friend or two to whet
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The aim is that you take the date offline really soon, and you don’t want your date to get the surprise of her/ his life then.
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The other person should be able to see you clearly and not feel that you are hiding your weight or your face behind those of your friends.
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The aim of online dating is to take it offline too and when you finally do meet people, you don’t want them to be unable to recognize you.
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Posting a topless picture of yours or one with extensive cleavage is definitely not artful. Ladies, there are too many creeps out there, so have modest pictures on the internet.
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Try to wear bright colours that are eye- catching. A pink top is better than a black one.
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Be discriminating, it will serve you in good stead. Take a good look at the photo, take a few seconds to read a little bit about her/ him and then swipe right (or left). It’s not about the quantity of people you match with, it is all about the quality.
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Remember this is the first interaction that you are having with this person, so be polite. She is NOT your old pal, so don’t take liberties. That will put her right off.
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Move it quickly from the app to SMS, WhatsApp or anything else more personalized. This adds more intimacy to your exchange.
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Don’t stay on chat for eternity! Move it QUICKLY to the real world. The point of an app is to discover new people. We don’t want you sticking around on the app forever. Move it offline by setting up a date.
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Keep conversations on with as many matches as possible. You never know when you get ghosted and, often, for no fault of yours.
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though remember that beauty is only skin deep and what matters more than the way someone looks is the way they make you feel.
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There are obvious advantages of having thousands of profiles at your fingertips, but that also means that you too are just another profile on someone else’s fingertips– that is till you meet her, of course.
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Girls usually have the upper hand because they have more to choose from than guys. She has probably found someone else to chat with. Don’t lose hope! Keep at it. Swipe more profiles and chat with as many girls as you like and then choose a few who you want to meet.
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Is ita never gonna happen
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Wave him goodbye and find someone else who wants to engage with you as much as you want to engage with him and who actually takes the effort to type out entire sentences!
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You want to form a good first impression, not a false one!
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Women love humour, even more so than hair!
The Relationship Zone
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You talk to the person even if you don’t want to or even when you are angry at them, because if you didn’t, you would feel like something were amiss
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Similarly, if she expects you to call her six times a day, and you have a hectic day- job, then you should be honest in telling her that while you do like her, this is not something that you may be able to commit to.
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There are far too many couples that break up, make up, break up, make up every few hours, especially in the time of WhatsApp when break- ups often happen over a text message. This is emotionally destructive and stressful and it’s better to rid yourself of the drama of a wobbly relationship than to go through it at all.
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It is just not worth it. If you find yourself wandering, getting bored and thinking about other girls/ boys, then maybe you should think about exiting the relationship, rather than sticking on and making things worse.
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Being clingy sucks. Give him/ her their space.
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Even if you love each other, take out a few evenings a week to do your own thing. You’ll be glad you did.
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She has chosen you and only you. It is not her fault if boys look at her and you honestly cannot control everyone.
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Demands– physical, mental, emotional and otherwise. Relationships are demanding, often draining, but we deal with them because we really like the other person and we see their value in our life.
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Talk less, listen more– try to put yourself in the other person’s shoes, especially if there is any cause of disagreement between you two.
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The cause of most quarrels is a battle of the egos, but if we just keep egos out of the way, then any relationship will be a lot smoother and happier.
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Some women think that sex is a way of ‘keeping’ a man. This is a myth. Plus, you don’t want to be with a man who is with you only because of physical intimacy. This does not make for an honest relationship.
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Hmmm
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When women have sex, hormones are released in their body that make them feel like they are in love even when they are not. Men don’t have the same reaction.
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When men have sex, the emotional attachment is substantially less than what women feel.
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It is important to keep in mind that when you have sex with him, you will find yourself emotionally involved in a much deeper way than before.
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Keep in mind that by having sex, as a woman, you might experience major changes in your body, including disease. You may get a yeast infection, or a UTI (urinary tract infection), and at times even both.
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Always use a condom, even if he doesn’t want to. It takes a fraction of a second to get pregnant, and if you do, then that’s a whole new challenge to deal with.
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Sores and rashes are the first signs and are rather easy to spot.
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Don’t let pornography fool you. A healthy sexual relationship takes work, it doesn’t come easily or naturally.
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But make sure you are emotionally and physically ready for it and, more than anything else, that you are prepared. Men often don’t think about these things,
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The more you think about it, plan for it, the less the chances of it being great. Also, watching porn is the worst way to learn about sex. Porn is like a superhero movie– too good to be true and nowhere close to reality.
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Enjoyment and procreation is sex’s raison d’être.
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That said, don’t be too hasty to jump ship. Relationships can be annoying, especially at the start and, like everything else in life, they require effort and patience.
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At times, people can be difficult to deal with, especially when they like you too much.
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If after a month, you find yourself drifting towards other women and losing interest in your girlfriend, then it may be time to break up with her.
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Sometimes, a little space brings a whole lot of clarity.
Parents, Pals and Other Problems
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Dating is cool, dating is fun, dating is a great way to socialize and is way better than just being on social media.
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Now if your parents are the sort who don’t like you talking to anyone of the opposite sex, then this is going to be trickier than we think.
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this is the norm or you start plotting your move away from your parents’ place.
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Yeah that is what i gotta do
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A boyfriend/ girlfriend is NOT your husband/ wife. They don’t have to be part of your family; in fact, it is better to keep both family and friends out of your dating life.
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our personal experience is that dating is an act between two people, and not between four friends.
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Don’t discuss your problems (too) much with your friends. Sometimes we all need a shoulder to cry on, but don’t put all that weight on that shoulder.
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It is human nature to snoop, and when the snoop comes across something that they do not quite understand, they often jump to conclusions and this can be disastrous to relationships.
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After dating a few people, you will realize that caste, creed and religion don’t play a role in a successful relationship, and therefore neither should janam patris.
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The more you let them control you, the bigger the problem will get and the more problematic your relationship will become.
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As time goes on, he tightens the noose around your neck, till one day you just choke. A patriarchal boyfriend can be a difficult problem to solve for
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Men and women are born free and no one, especially men have any right to ‘grant’ you freedom to wear something, freedom to work or freedom to meet others.
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Do not allow yourself to be part of the drama. If your partner is having these mood- swings, you have to let them know that this sort of behaviour is simply unacceptable. If you give them the leeway to behave badly, the behaviour will most likely continue or get worse. So try your best to curtail it, or let the relationship go. You are better off without it.
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You longed to see her, so much that sometimes it felt like you may just explode (or some body parts at least).
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That feeling will be replaced by a different, perhaps not as exciting, but equally important feeling– a sense of security and stability, and the comfort of knowing you have found someone with whom you can share your life.
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Women sometimes sabotage their relationships by looking for everything in their boyfriends, and that is simply expecting too much. He can’t be your best friend, your financier, your ride, your partner- in- crime, your lover, girlfriend, your father and your brother all at the same time.
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Try to live in the present and enjoy the moment without having too many expectations. Don’t go crazy by giving too much of yourself.
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Expectations are the number one killer of all relationships. We get angry, sad, harrowed, when we ‘expect’ something from someone else, and they do not deliver.
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Understand that relationships are fragile and emotions are volatile and anything could happen to your relationship.
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When friction arises in a relationship, it’s best to pick up the phone, or better yet see the person, face to face, to resolve the situation.
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Breakups are negative, there is no point making things worse by adding more negativity into the pot. Rebounds are tempting and can often be a quick- fix solution to a broken heart, but rebound with caution.
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Immerse yourself in yourself. Refocus on the things that matter most to you. Learn something valuable about yourself that the other person could perhaps not see in you.
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Don’t give up hope, keep trying, but don’t try too hard either. The right girl will come into your life when she is meant
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That is BS, you hve to try they are not going to fall from tree
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If things are not going well, sometimes it is best to step back and go do some of the things you enjoyed doing solo.
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browse bookstores and you never know who you might meet where and what that leads to.
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That is why the good old adage ‘slow and steady wins the race’ applies so well in the dating game.
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We date, not to fall in love, but to explore and have a good time. If love does come, then we are lucky, but it is best not to have any expectations.