“We can love completely,” he says, “even without complete understanding.”

love transcends human understanding.

In the depths of the heart, love is always flowing, like a river.

Because our lives are far too precious to be spent in ridicule and hatred of what doesn’t appeal to us, of what we do not understand.

DON’T BE TOO GOOD

good to yourself first, then to others.”

In other words, people who are good at suppressing their own desires in deference to another’s are the ones who frequently get called “good.”

But the problem is that, by living in accordance with the demands of others, we unwittingly neglect our own desires and needs.

And then when you encounter someone who treats you unfairly or makes things difficult for you, since you do not know how to properly express your own feelings, the anger that ought to be directed toward its instigator

That is not good

From now on, before going along with what others wish you to do, please listen to the voice inside you, telling you what you truly want.

if you really do not want to do something, don’t try to push through with it, exhausting yourself to the point that you are no longer able to cope.

“Let’s all have coffee,” if you want a chai latte, it’s okay to speak up and say, “I’d like a chai latte instead.” We consider it good to be good to others, but don’t forget that you have a responsibility to be good to yourself first.

Learn to express what you are feeling without agonizing over it. It is a life skill every bit as important as learning how to read. Without it, dissatisfaction builds up, arguments break out, and relationships can blow up like volcanoes.

And if the relationship grows strained because you do not do the favor, it was never a good relationship to begin with.

Only if you are happy will you be able to make those around you happy.

Treat yourself to a delicious meal, a good book, a nice walk with a lovely view. As you would invest in the person you love, so you should invest in yourself.

Do not despair over what is imperfect in yourself. Instead, look at your flaws with love.

Life naturally takes a toll on our bodies, our minds, and our relationships. Rather than choosing a life in which you do nothing for fear of making a mistake, choose a life that improves through failure and pain.

But because of the weight of the secrets, we become more humble and understanding. Don’t judge people based on how they appear, as they may have difficulties that nobody can see.

smarter than you, attend a better school, work at a better company. But remember that none of us can know how our lives will turn out in the end. Though school and work might be measures of success, the older you get, the less important they will be. The true winner is the one who is happy with his

Oh yeah?

Remember that the most attractive quality is your confidence.

Compare yourself not with others, but with the old you.

If you begin to believe what others say about you, they will begin to control you.

But there is a beautiful meaning to “Namaste.” It means, “The divine being within me bows to the divine being within you.”

Don’t think you are lovable only when you succeed at what the world demands. You are already worthy of love.

Old friends have no need to display artificial selves; you can accept them as they are and share your true self with them. He was such a friend for me.

he also was overcome with anxiety when he had no work to do.

“Because each person’s situation is different, it’s difficult to draw any firm conclusions, but one of the known causes of becoming a workaholic is growing up feeling unworthy of your parents’ attention unless you do something great, as opposed to feeling loved and cared for unconditionally.

To win their parents’ attention, such children feel under constant pressure to do things to please their parents. Otherwise they feel unlovable, and their actions are devoid of meaning.

However, it’s the world’s demands rather than your father’s that are making you feel anxious— that if you don’t do everything that’s asked of you, and do it correctly, your existence has no meaning or worth.”

You don’t need to be convinced of your self- worth by taking on society’s demands and living up to its expectations.

Don’t let your difficult past define who you are today. If you do, you will live your whole life as a victim of the past.

someone is unable to think beyond himself, it could be because he didn’t get enough love growing up.

If there is a selfish person in your life who makes things difficult for you, look deeply into his pain and try to understand where he is coming from.

If we examine what motivates us, we see that even as adults we want recognition from other people, and that so much of what we do comes from that desire to be recognized.

Every now and then, permit yourself a little luxury.

Special moments are not separate from our everyday lives. When you make use of something special, it makes the moment special.

I like myself, it is easy for me to like people around me. But if I am unhappy with myself, it is easy to feel unhappy with those around me. May you become your own biggest fan!

If you feel that your self- esteem is low, try doing something nice for a stranger. As you begin to like yourself, your self- esteem will improve.

“Do not hate that person too much,” “Forgive others for your own sake,” “Do not envy your friend’s success.”

There is no opportunity as good as this to be mindful of ourselves.

“Lengthy deliberation often leads to a terrible decision.”

Now and then it is necessary to trust your intuition and push ahead in the direction you feel is appropriate.

Being alone makes the world pause for a moment and helps to restore harmony.

“I am sick” or “It’s going to rain all day,” then we feel that the rain or pain never lets

So, be brave and say honestly, “I need you.”

The experience of life’s impermanence is a great lesson.

“Some people come into our lives and quickly go. Some stay for a while and leave footprints on our hearts, and we are never, ever the same.”

If the parents are happy, then the child can grow up into a happy and confident adult. But if the parents are not happy, then the child can feel worthless— unable to make his parents happy no matter what.

we cannot control them, even when we have good intentions, since their happiness ultimately depends on themselves.

abusive language or violence toward the weak is wrong under any circumstances.

wrong to delight in someone else’s pain.

It is nearly impossible for a son or daughter to change a parent’s personality, values, or behavior. Even if children consider their parents problematic in some way, they have neither the right nor the responsibility to change them.

They are independent and self- motivated and prefer not to receive unsolicited advice from a father who can’t really know what their lives are like.

Love needs no reason other than love itself.

Though it comes from a good place, doing what you think someone needs can be the seed of wanting to control them, to make them a certain way to please yourself.

For example: If you don’t do what I want, I will take away something that is important to you, or in the future I won’t give you what you need.

you have made a lot of money, share some of it with your family.

You’ll be annoyed if every time your sibling asks for help, you feel you’re being deprived of what’s rightfully yours. But if you consider how your sibling might have had to sacrifice for you to get to where you are now, it will not seem so unfair.”

If we think of the child as a stranger, we focus on the inconvenience to ourselves, but if we think of the child as a family member, we become merciful, wondering whether the child is uncomfortable or in pain.

Before you lay your head on your pillow and go to sleep, recall just three things you were thankful for today.

A happy mind- set needs practice.

a handshake is not just clasping the other’s hand but also involves smiling, looking the other straight in the eye, and ensuring that your grip is not too strong and not too weak.

addition to reducing anxiety and loneliness, hugs lower our levels of the hormone cortisol, which gets secreted as a response to stress;

If you listen with great care and interest, they will come to feel, “I am a precious being,” and, “This is what it feels like to be loved.”

But do not wait for someone to make you happy. Make the decision to be happy for yourself, and act on it.

Words can become the seed of reality.

We communicate not just with words, but also with the energy of our emotions.

Your anger arouses anger in others, who retaliate either immediately with the same intensity, or indirectly over the course of many years in the form of gossip and passive- aggressive mind games.

because there’s more to being a good listener than simply listening. From someone’s facial expressions, tone of voice, and body language, we come to feel cared for and acknowledged and understood. When someone would focus on me, letting me say what I wanted to say without cutting me off or changing the subject, my troubled heart would begin to open

This is why I believe that listening is not a passive activity at all. Listening openly, patiently, and attentively is one of the most significant expressions of love.

we want someone to listen to what we have to say,

Because only then do we feel that our actions have meaning, that our existence has value. Without people to pay attention to us, our lives would feel empty,

We simply want to be heard. When someone speaks to you, do not rush to give them advice; hear them out.

Consider whether you think you already know your loved ones. If you do, you are failing to see them as they are right now and seeing them instead through the prism of previously held opinions.

Choosing not to hate them is the best revenge, the only kind that won’t leave a lasting wound in your heart.

“Just like me, he needs to support his family. Just like me, he’s thinking about his future. Just like me, he must be facing a hardship that not many people know about.”

We often hurt people without knowing

soon see they are my own faults reflected back at me.

WHAT DISTRESSES US IS LESS the circumstances we find ourselves in and more the energy we expend in resisting them.

We don’t need to suffer more by producing unnecessary thoughts.

was thinking absolutely nothing about that other monk, neither good nor bad. Wasn’t it likely, then, that the monk who ate dinner across from me also had no particular regard for

still we make all kinds of assumptions, deciding, “This person must think x about me.”

projections of our anxiety onto someone else, we teach ourselves to dislike and even hate them, firmly believing in the truth of our assumptions.

After all, we are all imperfect beings who need one another.

It’s best for two people to be equally drawn to each other. If one person likes the other too intensely, too soon, it can be scary, burdensome, or annoying.

Two people can have a great first impression of each other, only for the relationship to quickly go bad. Rather than having seen each other for who they are, they only saw a fantasy that they projected onto each other.

When you are so close that you feel there is nothing you cannot say, you can easily hurt each other.

Kaushik

It takes time to develop trust and affection. Wait until you actually miss each other before meeting up again.

People who do not make an effort to form or maintain a relationship, thinking that it will happen if it’s meant to, often remain single.

good relationship will never come about without work.

If he constantly makes excuses, let him go. You deserve better than him.

The more expectations you have for a relationship, the more likely it is to go awry. When a relationship feels difficult, examine it closely. Might it be that one of you is expecting too much?

give only so much that you won’t expect something in return.

If you feel the need to have a gesture reciprocated, the relationship will start to feel uncomfortable.

Obsession feels a lot like love. But of course it is not love. With obsession, unlike with love, you feel the subtle selfish desire to manipulate the other person according to your wishes.

Even siblings who have grown up in the same house have different viewpoints and habits. Do not just tell them to adjust to you; make room for difference.

Do not think of yourself as a crescent moon, waiting for someone else to fill in the missing part of you. When you stand alone like a full moon, already complete in yourself, you will meet another person who is whole and complete just like you, and between you two, a healthy relationship can grow. Do not try to fit yourselves to each other to make one whole moon. Instead, be more like two full moons. You’ll respect each other’s individuality and interests while creating a relationship in which each of you shines brightly on the other.

Whenever I feel disappointed, if I don’t address the feeling, it always comes back to harm the relationship.

young man or woman in a relationship can feel disappointed when the partner who has been so attentive gradually becomes halfhearted, not even responding when spoken to.

your relationships with family, partners, and friends, however angry you may be, do not let the rope of conversation go slack for very long.

For your own sake, start talking. The silent treatment rarely works.

good job and money are important to our well- being. But when our relationships are harmonious, and we feel appreciated and accepted, that is when we feel most peaceful and content.

The root of happiness lies in deep and lasting relationships.

why sharing makes us happy—

you want to be happier and more connected, instead of accumulating things, let them circulate back into the universe and see what happens.

Give more than you receive.

“Why did they not give me as much as I gave them?” you are constantly impeding the natural flow of your relationship.

The reason we think we are better than others is that inferiority still lurks within us. A sense of superiority exists because of a sense of inferiority.

In the course of our lives, we meet people who aggravate our sense of inferiority: the friend with a more successful career, the colleague with a better education and looks, the in- laws with a lot more money.

But look beyond these externals. People who seem better off have other difficulties, brought on by the very things you envy them for.

Someone’s true self cannot be known by the things that are easy to judge, like physical appearance, academic degree, job title, etc. Those things don’t tell us whether someone is humorous, kind, considerate, good at keeping promises, generous toward subordinates or those less fortunate. Only when we know these kinds of things can we come to understand who they really are.

Who is an unfortunate person? One who looks at other people and sees only their flaws.

With a new heart, focus on the present, not the past.

When the waves of an ordeal roll in, do not act out of desperation. Instead, go to a peaceful place and dwell on the silence within yourself.

Layoffs Can be handeled

if you want to travel the world,

want to have a serious relationship,

BECOME ACCUSTOMED TO sacrificing the present for the sake of the future.

present just has to be put up with until one day that bright future arrives.

Even if the dream comes true, will it be worth the sacrifice we made to our relationships and health and happiness in order to achieve it?

What if we were just measuring ourselves against society’s yardstick of success?

start doubting whether we are right for the job, whether we ought to dedicate our life to this place just to make our parents proud.

I craved that acknowledgment and respect. My family had always been poor, and I thought I could change that if only I studied hard enough and threw myself into my schoolwork more intensely than those around me.

I got tired of trying to satisfy other people’s expectations.

You can live the life you yourself think has meaning. Even if those around you try to dissuade you, saying you can’t, you mustn’t, it won’t work, they are not living your life for you, are they?

Even if you fail, you will learn from your mistakes and try it differently next time.

better to experience failure while you are still young.

What do I want to achieve in my life? If the answer is clear, you can live more confidently, knowing your life’s direction and that you are not mindlessly following the herd.

striving to succeed in a highly competitive profession.

you cannot stand to make mistakes, you will never be able to learn a foreign language, a sport, a musical instrument, or how to drive or cook.

If a meal looks unappealing, start with what looks tastiest.

Starting is often the most difficult part. Once you have started, it’s much easier to continue.

New ideas often come from the margins, where people question and challenge the norms set by the mainstream.

Excessive thought won’t solve a problem. Rather than trying to fix it by thinking, set your mind at ease. A solution will rise to the surface. Remember that wisdom comes from stillness.

If worrying is not doing any good, say to your anxious mind, “If what I’m worried about actually happens, that’s when I will worry!”

Worry is layoff however do it when it happens. Now just enjoy nd be prepared

Are you suffering from anxiety? Try prioritizing your worries by writing them down. If something you’re worried about hasn’t happened yet, put it at the end of the list. Worry only about the problems facing you right now; for the rest, you can cross that bridge when you come to it.

Thinking too much can make it difficult to act. If you just do it, then it is done.

Just ask out the girl kr say skmethinv nice you want to say

Even if it’s not perfect, set it aside and move on to the next thing.

Before an exam or interview, always remember: You know so much more than you think you do. Our unconscious contains an ocean of wisdom. Have confidence in yourself.

you can control what you are doing right now. The way to be free of worry and anxiety is to focus your attention on the present moment.

An expert is someone who has acquired skills and knowledge by making a lot of mistakes.

Don’t be discouraged. Things will get better for sure.

The exam is very difficult, but somehow we think we will pass.

If their life’s journey has been fairly smooth up to that point, their failure will feel like a wake- up call to a harsh reality.

and look carefully at where we went wrong.

avoid making the same mistakes

The starting point should have never been myself but the needs of the college.

From then on, I prepared for the remaining interviews by thoroughly researching what each college was looking for.

Instead of settling for the vague hope that things will be okay if you just try harder next time, figure out exactly where you went wrong, and don’t repeat the same mistake again.

Each time we fail, we can learn from our mistakes and become a little bit wiser and more prudent.

an opportunity to rethink our lives and grow mentally and spiritually.

Failure is meaningful in itself, teaching you many new things.

Having too much success too young is one of life’s greatest perils. Don’t try to climb higher than you can go before you’re ready. You will get there step- by- step.

There is no fixed answer, no single solution. We find the best approach through trial and error.

we look at our lives as a whole, our current difficulty is like a cloud. Although large, it will soon pass.

Do not beg for people’s attention. As you discover and develop your unique strengths, they will pay attention to you automatically. If you catch yourself desiring people’s attention, tell yourself, “I just have to get better at what I do.” You are noble; don’t act like a beggar.

Be like the rock, which is not easily moved by other people’s praise or criticism.

Even when you have tried your absolute best, someone might still be critical or snide.

No matter who you are, it is impossible for you to please everyone.

we see someone passionate about his work, we naturally feel drawn to him.

is completely absorbed in his work, we can’t take our eyes off of him. Passion is contagious.

It is not the product that sells but the seller’s passion.

heaven wants you to grow, it sends one rival who is more capable than you and has a better background and a nicer personality. As you compete with your rival, you discover different abilities lying dormant inside you. Although you might have hated your rival, when you look back and see how much you grew during that time, you will probably feel grateful to him.

Try solving this riddle: “Do you know which role is the most difficult one in your company?” Answer: “The role I am assigned

Do not try to demonstrate how smart you are by nitpicking people’s faults that are too minor even to mention. It will be obvious what you are doing.

Instead, try to win recognition through your own hard work and talent. The moment you attack someone, your true worth is revealed.

It’s a mistake to assume that everything about your dream job will be fun and interesting. All jobs have their tedious aspects.

This seems to be the case with every kind of work. You get to do what you like if you also do what you don’t like.

Knowing that you can now show how hard you have been working, you even become somewhat excited. If you’ve prepared thoroughly, there’s nothing to be nervous about.

“Put your heart, mind, and soul into even your smallest acts. This is the secret of success.”

seems we acquire the most strength and wisdom at those points in our lives that are the most difficult.

Once you have acknowledged your insecurities like this, you will find the courage within to overcome them. If you try to conceal the inferior part of yourself while feeling ashamed of it, it will continue to be a problem. No one really cares about it if you are comfortable with

“Actually, it was my aunt, the wife of my dead father’s older brother; I hated how she always looked down on my mother, saying that someone so poor and uneducated would never make a better life for herself and her children. And so to prove her wrong, I was determined to work harder and become more successful than any of my cousins.”

ONE OF THE REASONS why forgiveness is so hard is that our heart does not listen to our mind. We don’t know how to connect the two.

If we can teach ourselves to look at our emotional wounds with curiosity and compassion, our hardened heart will, mysteriously enough, begin to melt.

The aim of this practice is not to excuse the wrongs that were done to us but to untie the knot of our own emotions, which are holding us back and preventing us from living a full life.

set aside our judgment and look at the person in the spirit of understanding, we start to see things that hadn’t been visible before.

reason my life has been such a struggle— it’s all because I wanted revenge on my aunt, and at the same time to win her recognition. But after she passed away last year, that possibility disappeared, and that’s when everything started to feel so empty.”

However much someone deserves your hatred, hating them will end up making you the biggest victim of your own hatred.

Resolve to be mindful of these negative feelings, even if for no one else’s sake but your own.

If you are stressed out, maybe it’s because your mind is overcrowded with other people’s thoughts and activities.

Ask yourself whether you truly need to know the latest news about politics, accidents, and celebrities. We mindlessly consume it all without thinking. And, like instant noodles, it provides no nutrients.

Life’s pain is not something to be overcome. Instead, it calls for gentle love and healing.

Gaze warmly at your pain, without denying or resisting it. If you do, you will detect the love that lies beneath

Even physical pain

The heart’s wounds are healed when we encounter beauty or humor. When we walk amid the beauty of nature, our thoughts rest. When we look at beautiful art, our sensibilities are stimulated. When we talk with a humorous friend, our mind brightens. Through beauty and humor, we return to our original state and become whole again.

Similarly, take an extra five minutes to enjoy a meal. You will be able to taste the food properly, and the meal won’t sit heavy in your stomach.

A mere five or ten minutes here and there can dramatically improve your quality of life.

If we have too many possessions, we do not possess them; they possess us.

Uncluttered space is a source of comfort and relaxation, and you are left with only the things that make you happy.

when I got sick but didn’t know the cause or how to

WHENEVER FEELINGS OF DEPRESSION have taken hold, I’ve examined my mind carefully and discovered some striking characteristics about it.

A positive thought produces a positive feeling, whereas a negative thought leads to a negative feeling.

the depressed feeling remains only a visitor, disappearing along with the thought. So if we want to understand feelings of depression, we must first understand the thoughts that give rise to them.

Moreover, since thoughts tend to operate on a subconscious level, we cannot easily distinguish between those that reflect objective reality and those that reflect our subjective opinions. This means we are quick to believe that our thoughts are a clear reflection of reality even when this is absolutely not the case.

your depression is triggered by negative comments about you by people who don’t know you very well, you should understand that though it sounds like they’re talking about you, their words say more about their own negative psychological state than they do about you.

keep in mind that most thoughts are personal opinions based on our limited experience.

if you catch yourself having negative thoughts, rather than thinking too seriously about them, simply turn your attention to the present moment and breathe.

But nothing lasts forever, not even your hard times. You will get better.

Perhaps we interfere in other people’s lives because we are too afraid to face the emptiness and loneliness in our own.

Even the person who looks like he has it all is living in a hell of his own. We all face challenges that others can’t imagine. Remember that appearances aren’t everything.

But if you begin to care about the problems of others, you realize that yours are neither big nor unique.

inevitably find new things to worry about. Even if our circumstances change for the better, if our habit of mind hasn’t changed, we will wind up finding new things to be unhappy about.

There is always a gap between what you know and how you act. Just because you have read an inspiring book or received a great lesson from a spiritual teacher, it doesn’t mean your life will change instantly. Only when you put your new knowledge into action, slowly and with a lot of effort, will change begin to come.

slowly not only to deepen their mindfulness but also to enjoy the act of walking itself.

No matter what delicacy we might have in front of us, if our mind wanders while we are eating, then we won’t be able to taste a thing.

the mind must be fully present in the here and now, including while we walk and eat.

begin to feel that even a good thought is not as pleasant as the peaceful silence.

When you eat your next meal, try closing your eyes. We tend to rely on sight far more than on the other senses. If you close your eyes and slowly savor the taste, a whole new world will open up to you.

Five ways to clear your thoughts

we leave home in search of something wonderful, only to realize that what we long sought has been inside us all along.

the peace and contentment in your mind is more precious than anything you can buy.

“Silence is deep as Eternity; speech is shallow as Time.”

the mind’s mirror, jealousy, hatred, and greed can be reflected as fleeting images.

The main reason we suffer is because we mistakenly equate objects with the observer.

“True freedom is being without anxiety about imperfection.”

uncertainty about the future.

Does true sacredness dwell in the stone that bears the Buddha’s image, or in the mind, which knows sacredness?

THE HARDEST THING IN THE WORLD is putting what you know into practice, and making sure your actions do not contradict your words.

When we are beset with difficulties, we naturally become more alert and mindful. When things are going well, we don’t meditate much. Difficulties are blessings in disguise to foster mindfulness.

If the teacher is worshipped like a god, and he seems to enjoy it, be wary.

Be careful not to succumb to inertia.

many people whose distress stems from their inability to move on from setbacks or let impossible dreams go.

the memories, regrets, and frustrations come back and torment us, leaving us unable to focus on anything.

The memory itself is not the problem— it’s still there; it’s the emotions connected to the memory that are the problem.

Although emotions are born inside of you, don’t assume that they belong to you. That is why they rarely listen to

Love’s true face is acceptance and freedom, not restriction and control.

Until you started thinking something was a problem, it hadn’t really bothered you much, had it? Labeling something a problem is often what makes it one.

In many things in life, the good is mixed with the bad. If you throw away the whole thing because you dislike the bad part, you’ll also throw away much that is good.

Even things that initially look bad

contain something good, if only we look closely.

“The secret to a happy life is not chasing after a better job but learning to enjoy the job you have.”

if you have everything you’ve ever wanted, you won’t be happy if you’re always striving for more or better.

Happiness comes when our hearts are peaceful and content, and when we learn to appreciate what we already have.

Instead of postponing your happiness until you’ve achieved your goal, live a little and enjoy the moment. Life is passing you by while you are waiting.

Trust the wisdom that exists in silence, and rest your hardworking mind for a while.

The Things You Can See Only When You Slow Down,

when you’ve done everything the doctor recommended but your illness persists— at such times it’s inevitable that we become frustrated and depressed.

Why do we consider good weather to be the norm that bad weather disrupts? Why should the sun always shine on us?

we have to learn to take the rough with the smooth, and see both as equal parts of our lives.

It’s thanks to these low points that, when we’re again riding the crest of the wave, we’re able to be humble rather than arrogant, and to have the wisdom not to get carried away.

the world is like a great web, where everything is connected to everything else, no matter how far apart; so how can anything be due solely to one person’s shortcomings?

people’s given situation or background makes some things inherently harder for them than for others?

Try making your own slump an opportunity to be more compassionate toward others who are also struggling.

Your efforts, however small, are never in vain.

It’s in struggling to solve the challenges that life throws at us that our talents are honed and our endurance

Depending on whom we are speaking to, we change our story or profess different values. We are nice to strangers but not to our family. The first step to maturity is becoming aware through introspection of our own shortcomings.

The way to avoid becoming servile before others who have power, fame, or money is to be happy with your life.

Worry about bad things when they happen, not before.”

Try doing something in a way that is different from your way. A new world will open up to you.

We suffer as we put off the things we ought to finish today.

you’re not sure whether to do something, ask yourself whether it will weigh heavily on you if you don’t do